I'm sitting here at 1am just randomly tired and angsty. I moderated over at FacebookSexism today (which I'm down to doing about once a week for reasons of self care and being busy) and after managing a whole bunch of hateful trolls that popped up like they do after every time I post (block, block, blockity block) I remembered that this blog exists.
Oh, this blog. My dear nerdyfeminist.com...what am I to do with you?
It's no secret that my writing has petered off in the past few months. It's not just LESS content: it's (what I would consider) significantly less substantial content.
I didn't happen over night so it's taken me a while to notice that I'm at a point where it's like the wind is out of my damn sails. I've seen a lot of bloggers in many fields reach this spot, or something similar to it. For me it's a real writing block, unlike the others I've had. My brain isn't thinking, "What should I write about?" or "What should be my inspiration?" or "When the heck can I find time to write?" to
"Do I even want to write anymore?"
"Is this thing worth keeping up?"
"Is this what I want?"
As I've mentioned before, my personality type is such that I beat myself up about not producing content. I want to reach the goals I set myself. Since 2009, that has been important to me. But it's just sort of NOT anymore. Where I used to want to write 3 times a week, I now can let weeks slip by without putting a single word on the page.
And I'm not upset about it.
I don't really know where this is going. I'm not announcing that I'm shutting this thing down or anything. I'm immensely proud of (most) everything I've done here and I definitely want to keep it open as a place to come rant if I need, but I'm just letting go of any expectations that I have for myself about it.
I'm just working through it all still and I know, I know, who cares? But yeah, that's where I am right now if anyone is wondering.
Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.
No comments:
Post a Comment
This blog has strict comment moderation intended to preserve a safe space. Moderation is managed solely by the blog author. As such, even comments made in good faith will be on a short delay, so please do not attempt to resubmit your comment if it does not immediately appear. Discussion and thoughtful participation are encouraged, but abusive comments of any type will never be published. The blog author reserves the right to publish/delete any comments for any reason, at her sole discretion.
TL;DR Troll comments are never published, so don't waste your time.